| Wednesday, June 28, 2006 |
| Picture This... |
Feet hanging in the water on either side of the canoe as you drift with the current back towards the dock after a hard paddle upstream; watching the pink-ish, purple-ish clouds drift by as the final shards of sunlight light up the river... having a muskrat swim by and nibble on some green foliage by the river bank... gazing up at the mansions on the bank and imagining a sunset barbeque followed by a nice paddle on the river...
Man oh man, this canoeing business is gonna be sweet people! After kids club SJ, Colin, Tyrell and myself headed for the boathouse and evening #2 of being a member of the Saskatoon Canoe Club equalled the goodness of night #1. The peace I feel in my heart when I am drifting on that river is unlike anything else. I had dinner with Karis tonight and we talked about doing the things that can give us joy - simple things - not denying the simplicity of wanting something. I think there is a line to be careful of where we begin saying "I want this..." "I want that..." in a selfish, unglorifying way... but then there is a place we can come to where we can say with honesty; "This is a desire of my heart and would give me a lot of joy..." wherein we can launch out, try new things, be bold and speak our hearts in seeking joy from life. Tonight was a piece of that... I am so glad we went to the river for that canoe ride... I am hoping we go again.
There is no denying that there is a sadness in my heart this year - it's a weird feeling that I haven't been able to shake for a while now. But at the same time that there is a that sadness there is this yearning for moments of peace like I had tonight. I know I can't always seek those moments in my external circumstances, and perhaps I could even say that is part of what got me into this mess in the first place, but I can say with complete confidence that I am learning grand lessons... lessons like it is OK to do the things that can bring joy - being around those I love, meeting new people, figuring out who I am, becoming my confident old self again, speaking truthfully about all things (please not I said lessons I am learning, no way am I trying to say I've achieved any of these things yet...)...
Taking it inward, upward - like I've said before, there continues to be room in my heart for God to move, for Him to tear down walls... when will this come? I don't know... slowly but surely perhaps is the answer. Perhaps He is doing this in my river moments, in the quiet nights when I lay awake unable to sleep or when I'm holding some precious, beautiful child in my arms.
Tonight I had a water fight with those beautiful kids and man - the ability to inspire laughter and joy in their squeals and screeches... 11:26 pm and I must bake my raspberry/apple crisp while it is cool enough in the apartment not to suffocate. Anyone up for a paddle up the river? Call me! |
posted by Erica @ 10:22 p.m.  |
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| 6 Comments: |
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I wish I could have gone with you guys last night. Perhaps tonight? Tomorrow night? I'll be in the city both nights. Saturday for sure cause its Canada Day and it just seems appropriate to go canoeing on Canada's birthday.
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I made your blog! I'm famous! Woo wee!!
Seriously, I want to go canoeing with you (I wish I coulda come last night, but the family needed the car)
Thanks for supper too - very encouraging!
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Oh man, I want to go canoeing soo bad!! If I tried here it would flip over and I would die from the toxic deathly polluted river... Maybe next summer I can join the culb with you! Love ya Erica
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Hi, Erica,
Can I come canoeing? We've done the kayaking thing together, so it's only natural we could go out in a canoe! I wanna come with you!
crouton
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I would love to joing you for a canoe ride. It's been almost a year since I was last in one. I love hearing how you are doing and what you are learning
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Seeing everyone else commented on the canoeing, I'll comment on the raspberry apple crisp! but by the way, did you know I used to be a canoe instructor? yup!
Anyway, raspberries! Ahhh...my favorite fruit (I think it has a lot to do with nostalgic memories of growing up in the Raspberry Capital of the World) Here they cost $3.50US for a teeny tiny two mouthfuls basket! Too bad we couldn't trade some raspberries for mangoes!
Why don't ya do a little spontaneous trip down and bring a suitcase full of the "little rubies".
Love Joan
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Name: Erica
Home: Saskatoon, Saskatchewan
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I wish I could have gone with you guys last night. Perhaps tonight? Tomorrow night? I'll be in the city both nights. Saturday for sure cause its Canada Day and it just seems appropriate to go canoeing on Canada's birthday.