El Camino...
Es largo y profundo, pero voy a caminar el camino...
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Geez Lou-eeze Bettina!!!
Okay... okay... so I put trashy magazines twice, hence... I still have only listed 99 for my posting of 100 things I like or love about life.

SOOOOOOOO.... the 100th thing that I will post is the following:

#100 (for real): I LOVE receiving Congratulations on being accepted to the Culinary Arts program at a wonderful little school out in PEI that I posted about a few short posts ago. Yes, yes my friends... it is true!!! Erica Scammell, most recent acceptee to Holland College's Culinary Arts Program! Am I bound for the Eastern seaboard of Canada? Well, I have not yet made the decision (or sent the confirmation fee)... but, I have been accepted.

Would you like a demi glaze with that? BOOYEAH!
posted by Erica @ 10:11 p.m.   7 comments
Friday, November 24, 2006
What is out there?
For me. that is indeed the question I am pondering on this particular sleepless night. Who am I to be? What am I to do? Today I translated this "healthy mother, healthy home" thing... a Colombian girl is having her second child (first here in Canada)... and I loved every minute of it. Helping her, being able to calm her nerves and answer her questions... there is no feeling like it in the world. Every opportunity I get to translate for someone only makes me that much more grateful that I struggled with such loneliness and isolation while I was in Colombia. It was worth it to be completely ensconced in the language and to have learned so much... crazy!

Lately I have been loving a new idea regarding refugees here in Saskatoon - whether or not it will come to fruition we'll see. Maybe it's not for me to be a part of - maybe it's for someone who is more into communal living... I don't know. However, the thought is in my heart and it excites me. I have a longing to be with people and to help them... is it in me/my character to do this full time? Or am I too selfish with my view of time and space?

And also I then think about the fact that I have applied to a school on the other side of this country, yet am plagued by this indecision as to whether or not I should finish the application process by sending in my resume. What if I get in? What if I don't? Is my restaurant dream really a plausible idea?

And lastly, why do I view everything with such hope? It's heart wrenching to be disappointed time and again. Particularly when it comes to viewing my short comings. Why am I such an emotional person - sometimes I just want to shout out how I feel or express myself in my over-dramatic way... only to be reminded again that not everyone understands that very expression. The ultimate slamming of oneself into the final wall of guh-ness.

For real lastly... my buddy Chris was kind enough to point out I cheated on that last post and that in fact, because I listed Grey's Anatomy twice, I only listed 99 thing I love about life and living. So. For real now; to make it a true 100...

#100. Trashy Magazines and Hollywood news.

Yes it is true... don't you love that that was my #100? Hehehe... enjoy this weekend folks! Enjoy every moment!
posted by Erica @ 11:48 p.m.   1 comments
Friday, November 17, 2006
HAPPY 100th!!!!

Hi friends... today marks the 100th post on this blog of mine. What to say... what to say; how to make it special? I KNOW... I will write 100 things I like or enjoy about life, love, nouns, etc... ? ... lame? Possibly; get over it and feel free to share in response hmm... lets say 5 things about life, love, nouns (persons, places or things), etc... that you enjoy as well. I was going to title this post "Where have all the commenters gone?" But thought, you know... let's not draw out comments with negativity, let's let it happen as a natural result of people desiring to share with one another and me about themselves.

1. Why not just put it out there - Timothy Baerwald.
2. Why not keep it going - Dana Fern Barrand.
3. And drum roll - Amy Forrest.
4. Manatees.
5. Hanging things.
6. Fabric.
7. Cooking.
8. Leaves - bright, colourful leaves.
9. The smell of grass.
10. Pyjamas - I could wear pyjamas 24/7!
11. Tacos.
12. iTunes.
13. Valleyview. Shocking I know; but I do. I think I'm kind of proud of my roots these days - weird eh?
14. Music.
15. Playing Piano.
16. Painting.
17. Dana's Banana Bread - to die for.
18. Appleby Drive.
19. Majok, Nabuk, Njema, Atthok.
20. Bartending.
21. Serving at Red Lobster.
22. My JEEP!
23. Being hugged by the man when I'm having a poopy day.
24. Reading and the Library.
25. Chinese Markets.
26. Being ensconced within a new culture - having my senses overloaded with new stuff.
27. Plants - and the challenge that comes with them alive.
28. Zanzibar Clove candles.
29. Pier 1.
30. My bed.
31. Sleeping.
32. My blankets.
33. CSI.
34. Grey's Anatomy.
35. Laughing - til it hurts!
36. Zoos.
37. The train bridge.
38. Cheesecake and Skor blizzards.
39. Swimming.
40. Tanning - although my skin doesn't really take to it so well!
41. This one's for you Liz - Jim Belushi.
42. Skunks.
43. Squirrels.
44. Mice.
45. Other woodland creatures.
46. Counting my footsteps - from work to the public library is approximately 1800.
47. Curly Hair.
48. Sunny blue skies.
49. Walking alone.
50. Jogging.
51. Soccer.
52. Watching football on TV.
53. Watching movies. Hope Floats - one of my faves!
54. Writing.
55. Star Gazing.
56. Mittens.
57. Grey's Anatomy.
58. Greg on CSI and George on Grey's - both so very funny!
59. A nice pair of jeans and a hoodie.
60. Colombia.
61. Qatar.
62. The Desert.
63. Duning.
64. Hot hot hot temperatures.
65. Memories; one of my faves - hanging out in Peru with Dennis and Betty while they were on Trek. Huanchaco beach, playing in the waves and shopping on the pier.
66. Thailand - sitting in a restaurant under palm trees filled with mini white lights dreaming of being there with a boy one day.
67. Breathing.
68. Feeling Joy.
69. Christmas!
70. Opening Gifts.
71. The hope that one day I can give my children wonderful Christmas memories.
72. Summer.
73. Playing catch.
74. Camping.
75. Waskesiu.
76. Having my picture taken - although I am incredibly shy about it... why? I don't know.
77. Pomegranates.
78. Trashy magazines.
79. West Ed - with Laura Schroeder.
80. Riding rollercoasters with Elizabeth Epp.
81. Making crazy videos to leave as surprises with Amber Deschenes for the Epp-ski.
82. Snorkelling.
83. Coloring.
84. Everything to do with Erica Ray.
85. Bettina Mae Unrau.
86. The name Emily.
87. Catching that special someone's eye.
88. Analyzing people in public; trying to figure out their stories.
89. A gentle summer breeze on my face.
90. Watching the sun set.
91. Watching the moon rise.
92. Sitting and having tea with a friend.
93. Candle light and the way it makes me feel beautiful.
94. Driving standard.
95. Walks by the river.
96. Feeling love for someone.
97. Making magnets.
98. Brushing my teeth.
99. The soft feel of straight hair.
100. The feeling of being alive.
posted by Erica @ 8:11 p.m.   8 comments
Monday, November 13, 2006
Thank-You Dan!
So, recently... Saturday morning at approximately 10 AM, I was reminded by my friend Dan King that it was time to update my blog. Thanks Dan... I hadn't realized it had been so long; hope the shout out makes up for my lack of updating... And so, here I am. Updating.

What to say though? Do I take it deep? Do I keep it light? I just don't know. Lately I haven't been feeling too much. Actually; that is a falsehood. I've been feeling too much. So much in fact, that I cried watching the movie Click tonight. I am a weenie.

What exactly are these feeeeeeeelings I speak of? Well; I don't know how to put it exactly. Mostly it's that there is this urge in me to run. Literally, run - as in a jog. But also to run away from the mysteries of my heart... the mysteries of my dreams and hopes... and away from the mysteries of life. I don't want to think, I don't want to feel, I don't want. I want it to be easy. I want things to happen when I want them to. I want, I want, I want.

Secondly (was there a first? I don't know... it's 3 AM... why I am I still awake - dang you Pepsi; dang you and geez lou-eeze why do I cave in to you at midnight when I know this will happen??? GUH!)... man, now after that tyrade I forgot my secondly. Mother!

This post is over... I realize I haven't said a lot. But oh yeah - secondly. I feel like a jerk for wanting so much when others have so little. What does it matter if I have to wait for something I want... I am OK; I have a home, I have friends, I have life... sometimes I drive down 20th or meet with a family who literally has nothing and get so infuriated at the part of me that wants so much. If I could rip out my selfishness and self-centeredness and lose it forever I feel I would be so much a better person.

I miss Colombia these days too.

I miss fresh air and breathing also; I wish to be camping in the mountains right now.

From where comest this feeling of discontent? I talked to these very neat-o pastors awhile ago and they said it was the Lord knocking at my heart asking to be allowed more room to move. Probably is... how do I let go of it all and let him work? I feel so close, yet so far.

I wrote a Shakespearean play about my bed today; it had to do with my love of the oh so comfortableness of it and how my heart sings as I lie swaddled in it's sheets. And on that note, I go to my dear sweet bed... to rest in its beautifulness.
posted by Erica @ 1:06 a.m.   2 comments
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Name: Erica
Home: Saskatoon, Saskatchewan
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The success of love is in the loving - it is not in the result of loving. Of course it is natural in love to want the best for the other person, but whether it turns out that way or not does not determine the value of what we have done. Mother Teresa

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